A Poem to Bring Cold Weather

Rusty's recent bout of poetic stream of conciousness, along w/ the Iceman's earlier season rap, has inspired me to submit the following poem in an effort to call upon the Snow Gods to smite mightily those states north of us w/ cold weather, so that we might see the wily mallard here in the south.

SOUTHERN SNOW
(and the disturbing lack thereof)

by Thunder Dan Taylor

I was born in Memphis,
a hundred miles below
that durn'd ole Mason Dixon line
that keeps out all our snow.

I resent the Snow Gods
who've cursed us one and all,
with six straight months of summer,
and six straight months of fall.

Snow would be so peaceful
way down here in the south,
o'er grayish woods and dormant fields,
a downy "Hush yo mouth."

I would have our winters
include a month or so
of snow up to our kneecaps
to break this status quo

of boring winter days
and boring winter nights....
Let's have a blizzard now and then,
just like Wisconsinites!!

But I'll just grin and bear it,
'cause I'm not gonna leave
the South where all my roots are
for snow on Christmas eve.

Instead I'll curse the Snow Gods
in my best southern drawl,
for failing to send snow down
to people who say "y'all".

OK, Boys, get your guns and gear ready. That oughta get the snow machines goin' up north. I'll see y'all this weekend.

DT